Apple Pie

My family has a lot of apple pie stories. You would think that every American family does, but our apple pie stories aren’t really about the dream – they are actually about Apple Pie.

It first started long ago when my mom was making pie crust for an apple pie when I was a teenager and my dad and I were sitting across the bar in the kitchen from her. The crust wasn’t rolling out right, my dad and I were teasing her about something, when my always-calm-never-mad-sweet-loving-caring-perfect mother was possessed by some demon and started throwing apple pie crust at my dad and I. Duck and cover took a whole new meaning when we scrambled to get out of firing range and then an evil laugh erupted from the kitchen where we once sat.

When I was finally out on my own, I called my mom because it was time for me to finally try to make that secret apple pie recipe that I grew up on. The one where the crust is flakey and wonderful and I knew it had to be an old family recipe from my grandmother. After telling me how to do the filling, I asked her about that secret crust recipe and my mother replied, “Oh, just look it up in the Betty Crocker Cookbook.”

Crushed.

Then there was the time that Mark, Kim, Ryan, Nikki, and I called on our way to a park where we were going to fly a remote plane that Ryan got for Christmas – we wanted to invite my parents to meet us because we thought it would be fun. My mom answered the phone and we could hear my dad in the background say, “Don’t tell them about the pie!!” Apparently my mom just pulled an apple pie out of the oven and upon hearing that, the entire car filled with “APPLE PIE! APPLE PIE! WE ARE COMING OVER!” My poor dad only got one piece of that one… which is beyond devastating for him.

And now I have my own apple pie story to add to the mix. We came home a little early from our vacation and on Sunday I decided to make an apple pie with some of the apples off my parents apple tree (it is LOADED this year). I am not the fastest pie maker in the world, but after discovering the Crisco in our pantry was from 2008 (the last time I made a pie) and having to run to the store to get new stuff, I think it took me close to 4 hours. FINALLY I was finished, it was beautiful and I decided I needed to take a photo of it. I grabbed my camera, but the pie on the counter didn’t look that great, so I decided to move it over to the table. As I was JUST about to set it on the table, something happened in slow motion. I have no idea how it did this, but I watched as the pie sailed spinning through the air and landed UPSIDE DOWN ON THE TABLE. I don’t think I could do that if I tried.

We were able to slide it off of the table onto a cookie sheet and flip it over, and I fixed it (above). It is a little sad looking comparatively, but it was the best damn pie we have ever had!